Well, here we go again—another so-called “Cyber Monday.” The day where the internet turns into a circus, retailers whip out their megaphones, and every company claims to have the best deal ever. Spoiler alert: they don’t. It’s all a scam, and I’ll tell you why.
First of all, these so-called “deals” aren’t deals at all. If you think you’re saving money, think again. Retailers jack up the prices weeks before, then slap on a “discount” to make it look like you’re getting a bargain. It’s like putting lipstick on a pig. I’ve seen better honesty at a flea market!
And don’t even get me started on the emails. My inbox gets flooded with more spam than a Thanksgiving casserole. “Hurry! Act fast! Limited time only!” Who do they think they’re fooling? These sales aren’t going anywhere. Half the junk they’re pushing will be back at the same price—or cheaper—after the holidays. Trust me, I’ve lived long enough to see this song and dance before.
But what really burns my biscuits is the pressure. They make it sound like if you don’t click “Buy Now,” you’re going to miss out on the deal of the century. Newsflash: you won’t. Most of the time, you’re just buying things you don’t even need because they’re “on sale.” Congratulations, you played yourself—and filled your closet with more clutter.
And let’s not forget the shipping fiascos. They promise you’ll get your shiny new gadget in two days, but what you actually get is a tracking number that doesn’t work, endless delays, and a package that looks like it was stomped on by a herd of reindeer. Merry Christmas, indeed.
If you really want to save money, here’s my advice: don’t buy anything. That’s the best deal of all. Take a walk, read a book, bake some cookies—do anything other than staring at your screen and falling for these shenanigans. The best gifts don’t come with price tags anyway.
So, to all you Cyber Monday marketers out there, I say this: You can keep your so-called deals. Grandma Esther isn’t buying it—literally.
That’s my two cents. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have a good book waiting and a plate of cookies to bake. Much better use of my time.
